Deep inside of us lies buried trauma. We have hidden wounds and scars that are covered by smiles and successes. If one were to observe us as a passer-by, they might never know just how much pain we carry, and worse.....how long we've been holding it all inside of us. While sometimes it is better to listen than it is to speak, there always comes a time where one must break the silence.
Some of us walk through this world feeling so alone. We were repeatedly victimized, abandoned or abused during impressionable years, yet we rarely(if ever) told a soul. Now as adults, we go through the day to day motions, smiling on the outside in an effort to keep up an image of class and sanity, when on the inside, we are on the verge of a mental breakdown of volcanic proportions. Pressure can only build so long. An eruption is of the inevitable. The only question is....when?
So, how long are you going to hold it all in? How long are you going to wish your life was nothing more than a bad dream? How long are you going to look in the mirror and hate the person staring back at you? How long????? It's time to find someone to talk to. Find someone very trustworthy that you can confide in, and begin to unburden yourself one bad memory at a time. While it may hurt worse at first, there is healing in the face of forgiveness. And if you can't forgive, at least you can finally take that human size jar full of hurt, and pour it all out. It's time now. Take care everyone!
See you next time!!!
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I swear Adam... it is like you know me. You have just described me... well the me over a year ago. It took me almost completely loosing it to realise, I could not pretend any more. I was done faking it, I was done with being unhappy. You know what I did, I talked to some one and still do, about once a month. I am not going to deny that I still hold a lot of feelings in and that I still put on a smile because I know that I do. But I am working on it!! Thanks Adam
ReplyDeleteBreaking the silence was the best thing I ever did. It hasn't completely healed the wound, but it was the beginning of letting it out. The eruptions still happen sometimes, but the pain grows weaker.
ReplyDeleteA brave and thoughtful blog. Good to find you.
I know exactly what you are talking about. We try to stay so strong(either for ourselves or for others), but in all reality, we can only stay stoic for so long. There is a real human being underneath the facade, and sooner or later, we must face him or her. Nice hearing from you again Ava! Take care!
ReplyDeleteGreat post Lesley. While many wounds fade, often we are left with scars, which seem to be somewhat less painful reminders of past traumas. Most of the time we forget the scars are even there, but on occasion, we are forced to look down at our "reminders". That being said, the more we treat any wound or scar(in this specific case, by talking), the less visible and painful the wounds seem to become. Take care!!!
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